I thought three-dimensionally, but found a happy ending in the friend zone

On a Saturday night in April of last year, I found myself at a bar in downtown La Cita, with my best friend Sam. We had just come from the spring concert at USC, where I was a master’s student, and we felt like the night was going on.

I ended up with Gil, a former UCLA student with a mustache and goatee combo and a sarcastic sense of humor.

Over the summer, Gail and I continued to text and meet up here and there. At one point, another friend of mine from school and I ended up at a bar at his house. I told him he should join us.

“What, like a three way?” He replied jokingly.

That joke opened Pandora’s Box, because the next thing I know, he’s asking me if I’ve ever had a three way. I told him no, but I wanted to try it. I am bisexual he told me we should arrange one.

He learned about an app called 3Fun, where couples can meet a “unicorn,” or someone willing to join the couple for some sexual fun. However, I noticed that the app was disproportionately more by couples than by single girls. So we realized we needed another strategy.

He knew I had already set my hing to “the girls,” so he suggested I ask some of the ladies there if they wanted to have a three way with us. I’m not exactly sure how we didn’t get banned from Hing, but over the next few months, in my free time, that’s what I did. I was looking for possibilities.

In winter, work was slow, so I had more time. I befriended a woman named Natalia. She was from another state but she was in Los Angeles, staying with her sister for the holidays. I asked her when she was available.

The only days she was free to visit were the days Gil was out of town, but one of the days she was available was New Year’s Eve.

I had no plans and I just wanted to go out and party. So we did. We first met at a bar to talk, then we went to a club and danced the night away. He was my New Year’s kiss and became one of my best friends. We started talking every day after that on text, direct messages Instagram and TikTok. We told each other about everything that was going on in our lives and shared funny jokes. I even went to visit her in Texas for her birthday.

A few months later, I went into the worst depression of my life. This usually happens at the beginning of each year. Meanwhile, Gail and I began to drift apart. I still had my Hing open to girls, but I wasn’t actively using the app.

One day in February, I received a direct message from Genesis, who I had met a few months ago, but had not spoken to for a long time. She told me she had just left a bad relationship and wanted to talk to someone about it. She didn’t have many friends to turn to.

I knew what it was like. Three years ago, I was in an abusive relationship where my ex cut me off from my friends. After I got out of that five-year relationship, my best friend Sam started taking me to clubs, and it helped me have fun and build more confidence. I thought that similar efforts could help the creation.

I told her we should go to Beso, a new club in Downey where she lives. When I got to her house, I had two Blue Buzzballs cocktails for each. As we played before, we talked about the men and how we felt that most of them were not trustworthy.

It felt good to talk and communicate with her.

Later, as we walked into Beso, he worried that the drinks at the club would be expensive. But I told him not to worry. We will not be the ones paying for them.

Within two minutes at the base, two guys bought us drinks. We wandered around the dance floor a bit and found a group of girls to join. (We still follow them on Instagram.) At the end of the night, some guys invited us to their barbershop to continue drinking, so we went. The next night, I woke up on the Genesis couch. She became my partner in crime.

Janice and I went every weekend after that. We would go to clubs like Reserve and Yost, and we would always make new friends every time we went out.

Once, we followed the DJs home to their trap house and stayed there until noon the next day. Another time, we ended up with both our phones dead on Hollywood Boulevard. I felt like I finally met someone as wild as me.

Around the same time I started hanging out with Janice, I found Lindsay, who I also met at Hang. She introduced me to high-end parties and promoters so that I could go to the VIP sections. Together, Lindsay and I went to bottle service at Pappy, a nightclub on La Cienega Boulevard, to meet rapper Mike Sherm, who she follows on Instagram.

Lindsey is a model, so I’ll go to the photos with her. With Lindsey, I always felt like a bad bitch. In June, I went with Lindsay and Natalya to a weekend meet at Sophie Stadium.

What I love about Natalia, Genesis and Lindsay is that they always listen, give me advice and remind me that I deserve someone who will put as much effort into a relationship as I do. I realized that the love I was looking for was actually with girls who were there for me all along. I was looking for a third, but I ended up finding three best friends.

The author is a freelance journalist in Los Angeles. He lives in Hacienda Heights. Its substack is victoriaevalenzuela.substack.com.

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